1. |
Brown Out
02:08
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They teach me to erase that brown, subconsciously I lose my crown/
‘Til I don’t even recognize the person that’s inside me now/
We came from the slums once, now livin’ the humdrum/
In search for the green funds, we never can keep one/
My mama on 9-5, then switch to an 8-1/
An immigrant family losin’ our names, and our face, and the place that we came from/
These institutions working, the devil prove he lurkin’/
They shoot us down but first when, we play the part and curtains/
Open up til we prefer them, ‘til we don’t know we hurtin’/
‘Til we become a version: a self that’s lost it’s worth/
So how can I breathe in this land of the free?/
My people aint free when the freedom ain’t free/
I look in the mirror then all that I see/
Is a version of me that they want me to be/
Plus all of these lies I adopted see/
I’ll never be what they want me to be/
The devil’s at work and he lookin’ like me/
Can you tell me my worth? and I’ll pay you the fee/
‘Til I fall on my knees and I’m feelin’ defeat/
And so give me a reason, the image they feed/
To the flows that I breathe ‘cuz we parted the sea/
Can you pardon my speech? And the accent I speak?/
I whiten my skin ‘cuz it’s all that I see/
No image of me represented to be/
Myself so I’m looking for ways I could be/
Exactly like people they teach me to be!/
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2. |
Here
02:29
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VERSE 1
No need for introduction, you hear & you know why/
Nose dive into an era where the beats are lo-fi/
I put my “face in a book” ‘cuz my people are “profiled”/
We erased from the books and my people are told lies/
Sky’s the limit? Go fly! Cali green? We go high/
I mean back in ‘05, already knew I'd grow wise/
But surprise, we grow thighs, double dose of broke lies/
‘Til we dove in those sides of losin’ hope it goes by/
I got Bam to my left and Eric on right/
Here to give a “New America” like Erykah Wright/
Try to take my “title?” never “will” to inherit the “rights”/
Yuh - Tacloban City's finest, put me on that 5 list/
Color out the lines ‘cuz “I color” like ya iris/
Hunger in my eyes, this is everything that I risk/
Kill it with my tongue every time I spit a free/
But the work is never done and believe I’ll never leave/
HOOK
‘Cuz I’m finally here, get your hands in the air/
Now the greatest is here, I’ma make this my year/
‘Cuz I’m finally here, yeah I’m finally here/
Yeah I’m finally here, yeah I’m finally here/
VERSE 2
If you call yourself a rapper, talk less, and take notes/
We slay “sheep,” respect “GOATS,”
we pray, sleep, and next toke/
We take beats to flex throat,
finesse steeze to bless those/
They say freeze! they test hope,
we say peace, but stay woke!/
Leave you cats phased to the point I catch praise/
Rhymes turn to catchphrase ‘til it starts to cascade/
Product of Mac Dre, Wu-Tang, and Kanye/
Break beats on beat tapes that break necks,
we press play/
They say we from the slums where the heroes never won/
But my people always sung, brown faces to the suns/
Kill the satan wit my tongue, fuck the spinnin’
from the stations, I’m rotating ‘round the sun/
The axis my mattress,
I pass out and pass this, abstract to masses/
Last laugh no practice/Back to back raps, Manila Noir, bar for bar,
homie check the repertoire/
Ibarra with the bars, they sub-par while I set the bar!/
HOOK
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3. |
Someday
04:32
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VERSE 1
I wrote this album ‘cuz I want my life to change/
Tired of being shortchanged, I'm tryna remain sane/
Hopped off the plane, didn’t stop all the pain/
My father’s still in debt and we've been struggling to pay/
For a bedroom up on Meekland Ave., reachin for just meeting half/
Hands tied against the odds, how the fuck you even that? /
The people from the slums once, now livin’ the humdrum/
Mama from the barrio so we dreamin’ we can stunt once/
Mama, I know it’s gon’ be fine wherever we go/
‘Cuz we know, you raised this girl to dream and be a hero/
What’s an ego to an eagle? I free flow when I speak though/
My pipe dreams through a peephole, my skin so Filipino/
But oftentimes my pride, inside, is fightin’ high tides/
The day we broke the ocean was the day I learned to nose dive/
Closed eyes, fingerprint ink with the most dye/
Those times, mama never blinked, say the oath twice/
HOOK
I said mama we gon’ make it there someday/x4
I said mama we gon’ make it here someday/x2
VERSE 2
So whats a freestyle to me? I been doing as a 6 year old/
Thinkin’ on my own 2 feet, survival pick & go/
Pick a role - you can be the swimmer or a sunken soul/
I was a 6 year old without a father figure role/
No silver spoons or dinner rolls, so will you fold or will you go?/
Pretend to sing like figaro, my people still invisible/
When you the spittin’ image of a person that you hate/
Makes sense im spittin images of dawn that never breaks/
Nirvana never waits, I was a pawn of bitter fate/
That spawned from inner hate, I never wanted to be great/
I study my mother wonder how she holds this family/
That minimum salary, stretched as much as it can be/
She stressed but keeps that shit from me, I’m just tryna fit in, see/
I crave for that acceptance like it validates my sanity/
I wrestle with affirmations, settle for masking faces/
After all, the stolen lands are always greener places/
HOOK
VERSE 3
At school, reduced lunches while my mama skip her lunchtime/
9 to 5 minimum wage, she at the bus line/
Here I am, filling a page, waiting to bust rhymes/
‘Til I’m nearing the day I’m getting cosigned/
Snare rolls and punchlines to pay rolls and punch time/
We take shows like crunch time, we braved those like front lines/
My life on these lines ‘cuz we never had lifelines/
And these days I’m scared of what might go through my mind/
I flow like Rizal and I’m writing like Hagedorn/
Mixed with Gabriela Silang, now watch as the page mourns/
Say my name, it tastes foreign, type to make your face form in ways you never made/
Born from another place, thorns couldn’t break away/
Or am I just a break away?/
From being center stage from off the page or will I fade away?/
I never been the type to say I’m scared of what I have to face/
‘Cuz all I ever knew is being me so all I ever need to say is…/
HOOK
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4. |
The Other Side, Welcome
05:18
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VERSE 1
It started in the Philippines, Francis M to Killa Beez/
‘Til I was 13 spittin soliloquies on Dilla Beats/
Silly me for thinkin these, television imagery/
Representin’ me when most these people never looked liked me/
Red, white, and blue’s really blonde, white, and blue/
I see my people wanna lighten but enlightenment’s in you/
Reflection of the hues, deflection of the truth/
Attention to the cues, we neck to neck and start to lose/
How can we be free and be a POC? cuz what do PO see?/
What’s their POV? When they see no me?/
They see you as a DOB or better yet a DOD, they hoping that you do OD, statistics of that lottery/
They playing yellow face, the other half are playing two face/
I feel they ain’t used to my face up in this new place/
New dreams to chase, too much baggage like my suitcase/
Feeling out of place and we got here on a Tuesday/
HOOK
The grass is greener on the other side, forget your dreams, is you down to ride?/
The grass is greener on the other side, come fuck with me, is you down to ride?/
The grass is greener on the other side, follow me, they’ll eat you alive/
The grass is greener on the other side, now I’m feeling lesser brown inside/
VERSE 2
I’m from a country where lightened means you enlightened/
But what’s a color when the hue (you) is never brightened?/
And what’s your skin if the texture be reptile?/
Half these snakes reading this text be thinkin’ that they less bile/
That crab mentality, in actuality, reality/
Why you mad me when we just look the same to them? they put kuya in the pen/
So I put life into this pen, so when I write, I'm puttin’ light and I rewrite myself again/
Mama, why don't they like me? Comma, they don't look like me/
Papa, they ask his ID, ego, it wants to fight me/
Ruby, don't take it lightly, just focus on plottin’ nightly/
‘Cuz we know, it’s never likely, If I don’t, then who will write me?/
I pray to a white God, prey to this system/
Put on a white mask, hating this brown skin/
Slave to the green bills, faker than Green Hills/
Hoping the fame will/
Make me escape, red pill or blue pill, a head filled with no real/
True feel of self, will, I choose fate or own will?/
See, we hopped up on that plane with the nosebleed seats/
And if we learn too much English, it’s a “nosebleed me”/
Juxtaposed with self hate, this flat nose goes deep/
‘Cuz we know they turn they nose up when they don’t need me/
It always on their terms, any percent you earn/
They wanna sell your urn, but melanin don’t burn/
4 counts in a bar - 4 counts behind bars/
How u make your voice count when they don’t even count ours?/
POCs be getting vilified, dreams be gettin nullified/
Kuya with that bullseye target when he walkin’ by/
Ruby Ibarra, first generation immigrant/
Tryna make a difference but times I’m feeling’ ignorant myself/
How can I lay a verse when I’m just lyin to myself?/
How can I start a movement when I’m frozen, I can’t help but think about the days/
My mama used to sit and pray, that all our problems go away, they knockin for that rent today/
My sister never learned to say our language cuz my moms afraid/
That she will turn to me someday and struggle to assimilate/
My father, he just looks away, I see the lines that changed his face/
I wanna tell him face to face, forgive him, and we'll find a way/
But anger's always in the way, my heart's consumed by pain and hate/
This country told us welcome but never asked if we wanna stay/
CHORUS
Welcome to that place you know, a million miles from home/
Welcome to this place alone, this is now your home/
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5. |
Roll Call (Interlude)
00:44
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6. |
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VERSE 1 (Ruby Ibarra)
From Morro Bay to the East Bay, we stay survivin’ where stay/
They keep invading’ where we lay, there’s no debating’ that we pay/
That naval base up in Subic Bay, to all the places that they tried to take/
From Magellan’s day to Philip’s raid, when the land was raped and they changed the way/
‘Til my father drowning’ in that alcohol and then my mama always be up in that Eskinol/
Cuz these thoughts make the brown skin start to crawl/
So I take the kush in (cushion) just to break the fall/
2nd class citizen never been one/
Traded the pesos so we can have ones/
Darker the skin and you scared of the sun/
Silenced to speak with an accented tongue/
All of these faces I‘m lookin like none/
Taught to forget all the places I’m from/
But we grew up from the barrio and slums/
My aunties be drinkin' that red horse and rum!/
Never be stoppin’ the work’s never done/
Long as they keep on corrupting the funds/
Thinking the damage is done and they won/
But we stay militant daughters and sons/
Let’s take it back to the first day of first grade/
All of you thinking of throwing me shade/
My people are roses that grew in the shade/
We came up in places exploited by trade/
I kill ‘em wit’ a bar, so hot, ‘cuz it’s top notch/
Thinking that you top mine? Stop, not on my watch!/
Like it’s 12:30 on the dot, on the clock, watch/
All I see are “hands up and down” when the beat drops/
HOOK
There’s some crazy Filipinos in here/
From the jungle, yeah the savage is real/ X4
VERSE 2 (Bambu)
put my San Miguel in a ziplock so I know it's real/
put my red horse in a plastic bag so I know it's real/
ayan nanaman si bam-bam umi init ang ulo parateng ganyan/
pero dapat naman kung wala kang alam/ d’bat ka nag poporma ka na ganyan/
para kang Buko Pandan na wala man laman, and that’s “eehhh”/
buhusan kita ng marame/ politicians, police and capital greed, pare, ang dame/
I say say my name in the right way say her name in a pig’s face/
mispronouncing these linguistics might find you washing up ina east bay/
and at this point in time there are tribal tattoo tribes/
all these stupid fools put on costumes like indigenous Etas ain't still alive/
an while they massacre the first island man I see Fil-Ams make clans/
sporting tribal tats but not giving back an not ensuring the natives can hold land/
that's that part I can't stand push that PCN beyond dance/
push that PCN for your college club to build bridges up to homeland/
only time I do the tinikling is when the bullets ring an i gotta’ jump/
big up to eyes in the jungle that's ready to dump
the guerilla-pinos that's a shout out to Nump/
and I murder a drum like it's out selling drugs in the barangay to get by/
and Duterte gave green lights to vigilantes - now drums must die/
got a little accent when I rap an I go batshit when ona track/
but I hold no candles to the sister-soldier, young Ruby Ibaaaarrrrrrat!/
HOOK
VERSE 2 (Ruby Ibarra)
You thinkin’ you winnin, but no you ain’t winnin’, they runnin’ this shit...right now/
And since the beginning, was taught to pretend, so we bleaching our skin...white now/
‘Cuz even my roots is a product of when they were killing our kin...wipe out/
Oppression from systems that’s holding the power they huntin’again...right now/
But if they mispronounce my name again/
I make em take in every single syllable over again/
And so never say my name if you thinkin you never can/
Cuz my name is a part of me and be something I will defend/
So if you cross me, you end in the cross hairs/
Crossin’ you out when I’m tossin’ the bars there/
Twistin’ they face like they mispronounced names/
And I’m tearing them down, I’m not stoppin my reign/
Flow so cold goin off, from the top, so pro, break ‘em off when the bars go blow/
Ain’t no stoppin though, when I speak get ‘em coffins, so, I’m a problem that’s plottin slow/
Like a sharp bolo, when I’m talkin’ they all get froze, I’m like Pac, MDS, I throw/
Hella prophet flows, it’s approximate toxic dose/
When I got this I drop it so, keep it raw they know/
‘Cuz they plot ‘til they stop that soul when they search off your pockets so/
Ain’t no option though, better run when the odds go low, got your arm in a lock and hold/
Hope you say ten fo', or they box and they lock you so, ‘til you rot and you lost control/
And they profit though, all these pigs that be plottin yo/
On these kids that they target, oh, it’s a constant flow/
HOOK
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7. |
Playbill$
03:33
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VERSE 1
We pay, they rob us, these snakes don’t want us/
Each day, we all play/
this game that they taught us/
In God that we trust but they preying on us/
If he ate, then we scrape, til we hatin both us/
My mama’s education don’t mean shit still/
From accounting to McDonald's just to pay this bill/
And we tryna sell our soul just make this deal/
But the people in control are gonna hate me still/
And we tryna save face, but they paint us with a brown face/
Colonizer tongue will never like it how my name tastes/
Made it ‘cross the ocean, muthafukkas better make way/
7,000 miles and they didn’t want us in the first place/
These days what’s the pay rate for a briefcase?/
Times 8, that’s the death rate and it’s prepaid/
Free wage, minimum pay, ain’t no leeway/
These stakes only get raised when the greed makes/
AK over these Jays, that’s a payday/
But wait, layin’ down straight on the pave, hey!/
Replay, cut up him great, like a DJ/
While they, throwin us bait just so we pay/
Brown face, was a Malay in my heyday/
These days, but you may lay in ya grave, wait/
Mayday, play the game straight or you meet fate/
Green face, how the ink taste, when it bleed hate?/
Seek change but we shortchanged in exchange rate/
Food chain, keep ya cake straight or you get ate/
Self made, everythings fake but we fixate/
On things that we don’t make til we self hate/
HOOK
Watch me make it rain, bitches don’t know that I’m paid though/
Watch me make it rain, I made that dollar from a peso/
Watch me make it rain, watch me, watch me make it rain/x2
I said now...Watch me make it rain, people never know my face though/
Watch me make it rain, I trade the dollar from a peso/
Watch me make it rain, watch me, watch me make it rain/x2
VERSE 2
Kun puydi la unta ako makakuha hin cuarta para ako makaginhawa/
O bag-o bat trato ha akon kun mabusag pa ngan mestiza pat akon itsura?/
Gin tutdo kita’t aton panit basura, pag gamit nala hin busag na pintura/
Baga nan peliculat aton kultura, pag kitat pulitika puro na buwa/
Uran han Yolanda gin tago an cuarta/
Gin kuha, baligya, waray nakakita/
Ka damo’n patay, ngan na lunod na bata/
Sekreto na may tinatago contrata/
Kay ay na pakiana, isara it baba/
Ikaon it bala, hira nat bahala/
Ayaw kabaraka kun nagtitinawa/
Hira ha imo kay nakuha nirat imo cuarta/
Korakot imbis, tumulong sila at nakakainis/
Paano kumita ng pera? bitbit/
Ang hirap ng buhay, tiyaga at tiis/
Palaging gipit/
Walang bang hustiysa sa ating bansa at lahat nalang puro peke?/
At ‘eto grabe, marunong din akong gumanti sa korakot na negosyante at matapobre!/
HOOK
Umuuran (I make it rain)/
Umuulan (I make it rain)/
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8. |
Curtain Call
03:15
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VERSE 1
Check this South East, mouthpiece, hit ‘em with that loud speech/
Funny that they doubt me, muthafukka crown me!/
I’ll be rowdy, what you know about me?/
Fuck all of that formulaic image that they tout me!/
Act out, lash out, here to take the fast route/
Brown out, I spazz out, then do it till I pass out/
No cutout, or layout, cuz Ima get that phased out/
My face out, my fist proud, so can you taste my name now?/
The hell that I raise now, I break out my place now/
No fakin’ my face now, I'm takin’ my name now/
They greyed out, they gave doubt/
The pigs out, no bail out/
They made graves, but gave out/
A false hope, we pray ‘bout/
This country of dreams, but weaved in the seams, a system that feeds/
On people that’s seen oppression, that means, a pyramid scheme/
What’s in it for me? We searchin for cream,
in love with the green/
American dream, a fantasy theme, they runnin’ supreme/
Your back to the wall, your knees to the cracks/
Can’t breathe when you lack the freedom, with that/
They stab in the front ‘til you bleed in the back/
They point and attack, ‘til you crack and that’s that/
Eat up the facts, they feeding you, that’s/
A key to the hack when they need you to act/
In a way so they keep you believing you lack/
Any sense of yourself ‘til you don’t get it back/
Oh oh, when it’s curtain call oh, oh x4
HOOK
Cuz when its curtain call,
who’s the person after all?/
When the truth all start to fall/
Will you rise or will you fall?/
Systems that be standin tall/
All the powerful involved/
They been hopin that you fall/
Will you rise or will you fall?/
Tell me when its curtain call/
Oh oh, when it’s curtain call oh, oh x4
VERSE 2
Cuz when it’s curtain call, will they all give you applause?/
For playin’ the part they called you to be, you lose it all/
Hopin’ that you don’t evolve, ‘cuz they know that’s the pitfall/
Are you in it for the haul? Play a role and be involved/
Did you follow protocol? Like they wanted you to brawl/
Bloody knuckles ‘til you fall, curtains drawn ‘til you withdraw/
Everything about you, nah, you don’t recognize at all/
Person that you were, that’s all, this is when it’s curtain call/
This is when it’s curtain call/
HOOK
‘Cuz when the show ends and it’s curtain call,
you die, you die/x4
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9. |
Voices I (Interlude)
00:49
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10. |
Skies
03:39
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VERSE 1
The grass is green on the other side, but you cut it up and so the snakes will show/
I got a one way ticket out this town, wait, never really knew I would go/
But for my damn sake, I ain’t gonna sit, wait, this is my time and I know/
That I ain’t ‘bouta waste another damn year, sittin’ here, thinkin’ if I’m gonna make it and blow/
It go Circa ‘91, as we follow the trajectory/
So check the text that I left for me, I do this ‘til the death of me/
But I’m fruitless in my victory, if losin’ myself and my history/
‘Cuz all of these systems depicting me, they buildin’ us up then eventually/
We wear it like jeans are American denim, we act like our genes have American in ‘em/
We fearin these mirrors, so how we be livin’, when given reflection no merit within ‘em/
So tell me how much you wanna be like them? Eat like them, wanna be breathe like them/
Change my speech till my teeth like them, teach myself I got a reach like them/
‘Til you realize then, that you're denied when, you'll never be like them,
I got a free mind when I’m stayin.../
HOOK
Way up, way up (make ‘em understand me that I’m) x4
BRIDGE
Way up! I'm goin’ way up!/
Deuces to haters ‘cuz my fingers raised up, they goin’ way up/
Forever, will never, I never, gave up, I'm goin’ way up/
All of them bringin’ me down, but I’m way up - I'm goin way up!/
VERSE 2
They say some stories need to wait to be told, but I need a way to unfold/
All of the weight of the people before me who never got chances to speak from they soul/
That’s why when I’m speakin’ it: cold, mamas “degrees” ain’t valid here so/
We never agree to be lesser than gold, cuz in our most basic of element know/
We shine - just like the sun gets, remind me that I need to run less/
From my insecurities holdin me back and that’s makin’ me feelin I’m one breath/
Away from saying I’m calling it quits, when both of my feet feelin’ heavy, it gets/
To thinkin’ that I got the weight of the world, on both of my shoulders or will it unfurl?/
You see, I’m flawed as they come, huh? It’s odd to forget where you from, huh/
I’m asking myself: Ruby, when did you change? Was it when you believed that they won, huh?/
but I’m goin’ up in the sky, high, I'm tired of livin’ that 9-5/
I’m aimin’ for higher, I’ll never retire, I’m givin’ a riot, no closed eyes/
when the cards down, I will never back down/
Put us on the map, it’s a wrap when I’m back now/
HOOK
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11. |
Background (ft. Ann One)
05:51
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VERSE 1
They sense the vibe in my vibrato, love the skin I’m in but I know/
That’s the reason that my father always drownin’ down a bottle/
Mama I’m tryna make it, but the odds against me/
These people say to fake it, but my selling points me/
Pray for me, dont praise me - /
I got too many inner demons that constantly doubt and always try to break me/
They wonder why I hate me - /
I don’t see myself in places of power but I’ve been thinkin’ like it lately/
I’m feelin’ like I’m 8 feet - /
With two tongues, my words aimin like the guns that they point at kuyas face see/
Ate can you paint me - /
Is what my youngest sister’s sayin’ ‘cuz we never seen her face up on that TV/
That’s nothin like me, until, I don’t like me/
I mean, is it likely, So I, I just write me, in these, poems nightly/
Which means, I just fight me, between songs that might be/
A scene from my life, see, I seen/
My head above the water, so how will I raise a daughter?/
When the currency don’t offer, same piso to a dollar/
I’m the daughter of 2 immigrants been workin that blue collar/
And these days they barely talk unless they dream across the water/
HOOK
I’m tried of playing just the background, background/
But when I’m down, it go back ‘round, back ‘round/
I never been the type to back down, back down/
I bounce back and I’m back now, back now/
I never been the type to…
CHORUS
I don’t know why sometimes I feel blind/
They say you’re gone all the time, but trust it weighs on my mind/
Maybe all I know is I’ll make it this time/
You see, I do this for mine, trust I’ll make it this time/
VERSE 2
I make my mind stretch for every line that I might etch/
Thinkin’ ‘bout the next rhyme like how come I ain’t signed yet?/
My dreams ain’t farfetched, I’m feelin like this is the last stretch/
Runnin’ through that finish line, been runnin’ from the past yet/
So bare with me the wait to, my magnum opus debut/
Mic check, first take it’s Day 2, we live, we never take two/
Swimming’ the high tides, we swallowing our pride/
We buy into their lies, I’m silent with my cries/
We trying to cut ties, a citizen part time/
She holding a 9-5, he holding a nine, five times/
He couldn’t swallow pride, so he called it a piped lie/
My father, he don’t cry, he talk, but I don’t try/
The music flowing deep under the “flat” nose and skin “tones”/
“Sharpest” of the “accents,” but we at home in these poems/
Thicker than the fumes in the Manila sky, broken dreams and severed ties/
Came here when we broke the sky, check it/
I’m the “food for thought” “heavyweight,” make the letters levitate/
Trying to be one of the greats, trust me, time will tell my fate/
So tell me, Ruby, tell me, why the hell you still afraid?
Your only enemy is you and that’s from yesterday/
HOOK
CHORUS
SPOKEN WORD
I scrub. Over and over/
With each stroke a technique masterfully taught to me by my colonizers/
That skin as brown as my father’s hands and as deep as the lines around my mother’s eyes/
Nose and skin/
Eyes and smile/
Name and accent--/
Indicators of where I came from, past the Pacific Ocean where the air is a bit more tight and the sun's rays a bit more strong/
I imagine the distant days when we'd bathe in the rain, the water naturally warm as it fell on my skin/
I would look down and see my reflection in the puddles that would form beneath my feet/
Distorted - but perfectly clear/
Brown body gleaming in the reflection/
But scrub harder/
They say papaya soap only works when it burns. And It burns deep. So scrub harder/
When we played outside on hot days, our mothers would say we smell just like the sun/
You don’t wanna be in the sun...they all say/
We are taught to fear darkness but ironically find solace in the shade/
But this skin, was built to change colors like chameleons/
This skin was built to absorb the sun til it blooms/
This skin that many spend their days hating, was built to reflect the stories of our ancestors/
You don't want to smell like the sun!/
Ruby stay out of the sun!/
So scrub harder!/
Scrub harder!/
I look down now/
And this time/
I see my color wash away with the water./
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12. |
Broken Mirrors
04:27
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VERSE 1
Reflections of a 5-year old lookin’ in the rear view/
Wonderin’ why she ain’t got a father like her peers do/
Instead they gotta babysit it, ten years later, been a minute/
But before you learn to lose trust, it takes a certain limit/
Product of a single mother, fucked up, when I think of love ‘cuz/
Father figure packed up, it’s never been enough/
So I’m duckin when I catch a feelin’, hate is what my heart is spillin’/
Papa killed this fate, a million times, so how do I forgive him?/
Pop a pill when pain is killin’, poppin veins, the proper feelin’/
People poppin’-up are just a prop to me, to hurt I’m willin’/
Porcelain turned poison venom, probably won’t prosper when I’m/
Seed without the poppy, prophecy's the problems pourin’ in and/
Pop that pussy, my position, lyin’ more than politicians/
Call ‘em daddy, guys are billin’, opposite the opposition/
Papa’s never far from vision, carbon copy pop’s reflection/
Fuck a mirror, it paints a villain, cuz its always papa in em/
HOOK
I keep lookin’ in the mirror like, lookin in the mirror like - why do I just hate myself?/
I keep lookin’ in the mirror like, lookin in the mirror like - I can’t even find myself/
I keep lookin’ in the mirror like, lookin in the mirror like - why do I just hate myself?/
I keep lookin’ in the mirror like, lookin in the mirror like - I can’t even find myself/
I can’t find, no, I can’t find me, I can’t find, I can’t find me/x2
VERSE 2
Reflections of a 18, daydream in a motel/
Bruises and they both swell, he’s toxic, but she won’t tell/
He promised but she knows well, he’s talking just to cope well/
And often they don’t go well, but options never go well/
Now I’m laying lifeless, my eyes can’t even cry, it’s/
Distracted by the lights that a reflection of my iris/
Staring at these mirrors on the ceiling/
He holds me, I can’t feel ‘em, these bed sheets feeling haunted when we in ‘em/
They say ‘cuz she's tall and the way that she dresses, right?/
He rapes it’s her fault, she should've been dressin’ right/
Like when they catcall, she shouldn't be out at night/
But fuck ‘em, it’s all of them that's been taking away her light/
So close your eyes, you feel like you stuck/
Take those hips, you nip and you tuck/
No consent, he feelin’ the rush/
Feel the burn with every touch/
Open wide to bruise in the guts/
Deep inside, you feeling the cuts/
All these mirrors never enough until you feel you never enough/
HOOK
Reflections to a young girl, a queen, and a young me/
Glass ceilings and these mirrors, these fixtures try to shut me/
They hope my light broke or maybe I might choke/
And wait I “shift weight” like walking a tight rope/
Mirrors that we use ain’t a reflection of truth/
But a direction of you or a correction of you/
Expectations vs. you, how do you separate the two?/
When the one inside the mirror ain’t as beautiful a view/
So please, baby don’t fold, baby don’t go/
Maybe we losin’ control, but don’t lose soul/
When we breathe, feelin’ so cold, stories untold/
‘Cuz what these broken mirrors don’t show is my soul/
Please, baby don’t fold, baby don’t go/
Maybe we losin’ control, but don’t lose soul/
When we breathe, feelin’ so cold, stories untold/
‘Cuz what these broken mirrors don’t show is my soul/
HOOK
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13. |
Descent (Interlude)
01:11
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14. |
||||
HOOK (Klassy)
Island woman rise, walang makakatigil/
Brown, brown woman, rise, alamin ang yung ugat/
They got nothin’ on us (aye!) Nothin’ on us (aye!)
Nothin’ on us (aye!) Nothin’ on us/
Island woman rise, walang makakatigil/
Brown, brown woman, rise, alamin ang yung ugat/
They got nothin’ on us (aye!)
Nothin’ on us (aye!) Nothin’ on us (aye!)
Isang bagsak!/
VERSE 1 (Ruby Ibarra)
Yo fuck a story arc if it don’t involve no matriarchs/
Our mothers work from the ground up, they craftin air like ATR/
With the butterfly sleeves naka Filipiniana, pag nagsalita mga banat ay bala/
‘Wag magtaka kung ako ay makata bulok na sistema, korakot sa pera, bagsak!/
But we puttin’ our heart into darkness, they puttin’ these pigs into office/
Oh you thinkin’ you schoolin’? but you hella lost ‘cuz you Betsy Devos while I taught this/
But Look at my ate she movin so cold, can’t hold a candle to her when she glow/
Flick of the wrist with the ilaw she hold, Pandanggo sa Ilaw, she drippin’ in gold/
VERSE 2 (Rocky Rivera)
We pullin' up in a Jeepney
All of my soldiers greet me/
Hand me bandanas and pull back my hammer, it’s warfare, when you see me/
Skin you alive for my country, I live and die for my country/
I kill a pig in a white hooded suit on the low....for my country/
They got evil plans in the devil’s hands, but I don't pray cuz I organize/
They got new ways to impose strength, so I teach mine how to mobilize/
We don’t fight for the money, for the greedy, for the white man/
All we want is our freedom, and the right to live on on our motherland/
HOOK
VERSE 3 (Klassy)
Goddess of guerilla warfare in every lifetime/
We don’t take no shit except an oppressor’s lifeline/
If you step out of your line, I will protect what’s mine/
Kahit merong rosaryo, sinong magliligtas sa’yo?/
Puro dugo, pugot ulo, mula sa dagat hanggang mundo/
Reclaiming what ours, the high and the low/
These women are Gods, you already know/
Roots deeper than water that run in our village/
The river runs red, you’ll be dead in a minute/
Like Nieves Fernandez, have you beheaded/
Fuck with my tribe, quickly regret it/
VERSE 4 (Ruby Ibarra)
Abaniko sa kamay at isang mikropono sabay/
At ang tapang ko gaya ng inay, at halimaw na ang sumasabay/
Mga bara nyo lahat sablay, mga rappers na puro bangkay/
Tinamaan ko lahat, patay, kaya, walang magiingay/
I got that, Filipino phenotype: kayumanggi, mestizo-white/
But give me that moreno like that Rufio or Keno type/
My lolas they be speaking like, those balisongs or bolo knife/
I breathe the ether need no hype, two tongues that’s sharper with a mic/
Anino in my history like from a land where greed is weaved in tight/
They thieve until one piso might just turn to C-Notes, see no light/
Hacienda like Aquino, right? Rodrigo vigilante type--/
They kill my titos left and right, when smoke and mirrors fill the night/
SPOKEN WORD (Faith Santilla)
So let it be known, if you don’t already/
Pinays have always been part, and parcel, if not, imperative and critical to the struggle/
Filipinas are no strangers to wielding our own power/
Of all the privileges that exist in this world, none of which you may be a benefactor of/
There is at least one you bare/
And that is the privilege of having been born a Filipina/
Your DNA contains building blocks made from the mud of over 500 years of resistance and survival/
And when you are ready, sis, we’ll be right here/
HOOK
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15. |
The Realness
04:06
|
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VERSE 1
3 days before my birthday, it’s beautiful outside/
Watchin’ the sun rise, barely opening an eye/
When the orange meets the yellow and the sun seems to dwell low/
I hit you wit’ a Ruby, nice to meet you, and a hello/
While I dream about the days up in Eastern Leyte, lately/
Raised in San Lorenzo, but Tacloban City made me/
Knew my life would change from the album mama gave/
Magalona to this day, and the poetry that saved me/
Like Uzumaki when I spiral with the skill/
If you take away this body's just a vessel for the real/
Destination to the moon like I’m Heinlein, in my mind/
Watch the thoughts bloom, ‘cuz if I rhyme, then I find/
Writing monsoons from my bloodline, in due time/
Owe it to my mother, lines deep like her smile lines/
The womb too the moon every tune make you miss this/
Summa cum lyricist, tell me who da realest is!/
HOOK
Hit em with realness one time, one two/
I hit em with realness one time, one two/
Gotta hit em with realness one time, one two/
Come look into my eyes, I got a bird eyes view/
Hit em with realness one time, one two/
I hit em with realness one time, one two/
Gotta hit em with realness one time, one two/
Come look into my eyes, I got a bird eyes view/
VERSE 2
And when the sun go down, do you feel that moon?/
I was that seed in the dark that no one thought would bloom/
The places that I’m from, people gone too soon/
So like a fly on the wall, I try to gauge my room/
Like what you wake up for when the dawn breaks?/
When everythings at stake, how you work with that mindstate?/
You wish for a clean slate, I’d rather have a full crate/
Of drum breaks and heart breaks, my one plate, can bear weight, that might make/
You less of an enemy, we feed off the energy/
M E before M C, i.e. you get all of me/
Fools dream of fools gold, I won’t be a fool, so/
Drown me in a pool of Atomic 79, “aye you,” can you remind how gold and ruby be divine?/
But if the object is to shine, I wanna brighten up this mind/
There's a picture bigger than this, emcees that’s better than me/
If we talkin’ ‘bout the realest then it better be me! Aye!/
HOOK
VERSE 3
Mama look at me, this the person I become/
Half beast, half girl with a sword for a tongue/
Oddly, being this godly, take my prey and disembody/
I gotta drop it and rock it to top its more than a hobby/
But, ain’t no "deal" for "I" like I talked to a Shinigami/
My rhymes are "death notes," how many beats I gotta body?/
I’m a “mad villain,” I relapse and “do miles”/
Y’all “Doomed MF’s” can’t mask your used styles/
These idioms I’m sendin ‘em to idiots and simpletons/
Don’t pity ‘em, I sentence ‘em, opinions, depending when/
We role models so the stage like runways/
We tryna run away to one way, the sun’s rays/
Focus on our daughters and the way our son’s raised/
Uh, Ruby Ibarra, I’ma make it one day, yuh...
Ruby Ibarra, I’ma make it one... way, uh...
Yuh, Ruby Ibarra, I’ma make it some... day/
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16. |
Voices II (Interlude)
01:02
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17. |
7000 Miles (ft. Ann One)
04:33
|
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VERSE 1
Hello America, break your backs for dollars, they don’t carry ya/
7,000 miles away from home with language barriers/
Land of opportunity, tell me is good to ya?/
But 6 feet deep on stolen land is where they bury ya/
November 1991, papa came here with a wife/
2 daughters, no money, but they wanted them a better life/
Piso to their name, so they piecing up the pain/
Ain’t no peace in a position as an immigrant that’s prayin/
For a piece of that Americana pie or for the C.R.E.A.M./
To appease the dream they sold you, but it only was a dream/
For a piece of mind to thinking that my mama could be seen/
As an equal not a foreign immigrant, or in between/
I was a kid in the sky nothing but dreams in her eyes/
Hopin that we would survive, but mama those were the times/
They tellin us compromise, they always feeding us lies/
Made to believe I don’t exist unless I wear a disguise/
‘Cuz I been constantly lied to, broken down til I cry/
Til I no longer recognize the person that was inside/
Until we fade like the sun, and we forget where we from/
Then we self hate til it’s done, and never question it once/
So mama tell me won, the person that I become/
I have a sword for a tongue and a skin that shines in the sun/
And because the place that I’m from it still lingers deep on my tongue/
And so every word that’s from my lungs can hold the weight of a ton/
If I’m ever slippin’, I’m never looking down/
I do it for myself, til the end I hold it down/
And even when I’m sinkin, I’m never looking’ down/
I do this for myself, til the end I hold it down/
VERSE 2
Feeling homesick as we go, mama’s never really home/
Cuz she workin all alone, livin broke, we need a loan/
Papa threatened mamas life, papa left with no goodbye/
Promised to myself inside no man will ever make me cry/
Now I’m thinking that I’m grown, all I wanna do is roam/
Runnin far away from home, in a crowd I feel alone/
Mama she be workin late, lines are showing on her face/
Too much pressure on her plate, I’m too selfish to relate/
Auntie said stay in your home, might get darker cuz you prone/
Look into the mirror, oh, Filipino blood and bones/
Questioning my skin and tone like I should I be embarrassed though/
Whiter skin is seen as gold, this is what we’re always told/
Mama said to learn their way, every day I emulate/
‘Til identity erased, overcome by inner hate/
Teacher said to hide my tongue, they don’t understand me none/
Hold my breath these foreign lungs too powerful they like a gun!/
I’m correcting mamas words, I’m embarrassed when she slurs/
What makes me better than her? this language wasn’t her first/
Ruby can you get a grip? Find a balance, you might slip/
Mom and Donna need you quick, stop thinkin’ that you the shit/
7,000 miles from home, but a million more to go/
Gotta make it on my own, I can feel I’m gettin’ close/
7,000 miles from home, but a million more to go/
Gotta make it on my own, I can feel I’m gettin’ close/
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18. |
BONUS TRACK: Yuh
03:32
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Ruby Ibarra San Lorenzo, California
Ruby Ibarra is a rapper, spoken word artist, and director from the Bay Area, CA.
For all inquiries, please contact info@rubyibarra.com
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